funny as it may sound we have found the best way to put nayya and futya to sleep... ear picking!! futya would just fell asleep almost immediately....
just we did just that. but alas i couldn't keep my mouth shut, so nayya ended up sleeping with wonder super power juice!!! heheheh...
went to penang last weekend. ahhh. u tell me how traveling with to babies feel like. its like trying to juggle with the roads, food time, milk time, tucking to bed time at any time of the day mind you, in a moving vehicle!!of course we ende going to chowrasta - when nayya was sleeping, night market - when both were sleeping, fish park ( hahaha - aquarium) - when both were just asleep for a few minutes ... both immediately awoke when arrived - and surprisingly not only nayya enjoyed looking at the fishes, futya too was really admiring at them.. following each fish's movements...oo we went to jalan gurney seaside road... both enjoyed the wind and effect of seaside air., shopping for food for nayya...tu je nothing else mind you.. time is always the key factor in travelling with babies ... they have to have their quality sleep time! and the last was taking the ferry... nayya enjoyed it very much when we came to the other side she didn't want to go into the car...
all in all its kinda good experience. of course we left mama somewhere else in penang. hehehehe...
aa... my little futya is already 4 months last (sunday)! guess what she can do now.
she woke up last sunday, then she did her turn! her first complete turnover! before like a week or so, she was practicing turning..and turning, but it was just 3/4 way done... hehe... guess she just wanted to keep up with her kakak. nayya did her turnover 2 days after her fourth month.
and what was the other thing?? ooo we gave her first solid or semi solid last sunday too... hm, what was it? sweet potato. she loved it. was going all excited... tak sabar nak tunggu food masuk.. but her first mouthful she just let the food stayed outside her mouth... lidah terkeluar je.. like feeling what's this weird feeling on my tongue?? then ma said give her air. she made a whale's fountain... the water was cold plus the spoon was cold too so she just spit it out.
today is already the fourth day after her rollover thingy even when she's sleeping she would turnover then cry of course! coz why am i upside down....uwaaaaaa...
this one is not the same as nayya.. so futya is more rajin. yelah being the second, so she's less manjeee...
i guess i didn't say about her 'ramah' part. she loves to to smile, that's one thing,
and yes nayya is becoming a good sister.... if her adik cries she will be the first to run for her. tu la sape kate there will be rivalry.. serious rivalry... ada la sikit2 when she wants to sleep ke, when her toys being given to futya ke.. ahahaha...
aaa well, the more the merrier. tula was afraid things would not be ok with the second one coming so soon after the first. but its just...just even better. there's always room, even when i thought how can i love another, and another and another???...
till then, btw, the video is how futya's crying face look.
It occurred to me that in order for me to say whatever I think is debating in my mind is exceptionally wordless. I am not saying verbally, but as in writings. I have these wonderful ideas. Yet I have no idea on how to put them in writings. Then they just slipped away. Not being said nor written. Take this one example, I just had finished reading the “Farseer Trilogy”, then it became clear to me that somehow our lives can be ‘wrapped up’ in our heritage and our family stories would be sung by our generations forever.. Or something like that. I finished reading that trilogy back in 2002. I begun with.. ‘As I finished reading the Farseer Trilogy,I...’. So I think I myself would never know what was it that I was trying to say. Some revelation for me, but left neither unsaid nor digested by the young, newly ‘educated’, naive me. By this time, that knowledge is just part of me, so much so I just take them as part of my life, just as how I understood that eating cookies will always be nice when I dip them in my tea or Milo. When I got the knowledge? How ecstatic I was? Both can never be explained.
Actually, now my problem has gone even deeper. My train of wise, beautiful, matured, yes, my revelation thoughts, understanding over things in life cannot be explained verbally, I cannot say them out loud, I cannot explain myself. That is even worse, isn't it?. I would begin my conversation by giving one kind of stupid statement, which is always my mistake. Then the response I would get ‘wut’? Then, I just stopped explaining. My inner self would say, ‘aaa...will never understand’.
Thus, my thoughts would be well, one day they will understand the way I do. Or maybe I would say to myself, “Give them time, Insya-Allah they will see it”.
Now when I tell someone or anyone about this, then the answer I would know, you know, I already know them. ‘You have a block in you’, ‘you need to do more exercise with your communication skills’, ‘you should see yourself positively’, the answer goes on forever.
That’s the thing. I understand we live in a community. We have to mix, talk, socialize, and do all the things humans do. So that we become human. Heck what am I talking about here? That’s it. I cannot explain it. Or the other way round, I just think you would understand... somehow.
This is my challenge.
For now.
Finding words.
Words to explain myself so that people do not say I am aloof, dreamy.
nayya futya in one stroller, jusco nayya, futya, safar... bobo' futya.. ada muke benggali?? ahahaha.. like nayya when she was 3 months futya syle atas nana... with nayya see that rose?? futya bertudung dgn wak myda... hehehe
futya hanan. she's already 3 and almost 3/4 weeks old.. soon will be 4 months. this coming 11th nov.
her pics.. prolly have seen 'em in aimi's or hana's or ayang's blog..
her thingy.. hehehe... well, she's different from nayya in the sense she can go from one hands to the other not crying.. senyap je.. hehehe... she will cry only when she's hungry or shleepy.. or now when she's sick.
she's now having fever, cough, blocked nose, bloatedness... poor little thing.just now her temp was 40degrees celc. now its a bit lower. really she has been making me really tired. i too am having fever. my taste bud has been out for almost a week now. food really taste nothing. before it was nayya.. she was really burning up.. her temp was 40 for 4 days.. she was almost admitted to the hospital... nayya has never in her life been that sick.. usually if she was having fever.. she would jump up n down... like she was ok.. but last week, she was not herself.. no smiles. crying every time she was up.. fretting almost all the time. having body aches, thank god now she can express herself better.. she would say..' semut' or 'akit' to her legs. or simply hit her head with her hands.. as a sign of having headaches. the weight she gained when she was in medan.. was lost. in simply 5 days. now am trying to get her appetite and weight. i'm really hoping futya would not be that sick.
for me after futya came into our life, boy i have been bz.. not bz with work, but bz with adapting, filling and getting use to 2...
now futya's handling woes is that sometimes she cant be handled by anyone else 'cept her mama. but had it been with nayya, at her age.. i simply couldn't do anything...
oo yes.. details of her birth... she was 3.75 kg.. half a kilo more than nayya.. like rite now am still having backache.. and muscles are still weak.. she was heavy!
this time the labour giving birth recovery was cut short by half as compared to my first time. m due date was 8th july. so on monday i was kinda relaxing.. not wanting to rush things up like when it was with nayya. tuesday... ok.. just pain a little... nothing much.. but that nite, baba insisted that i go to the hospital... i was arguing.. i was not in pain.. just a little contractions.. they were not consistent... being the degil me.. so what ba did was.. he came back from kl i think, just to send me to the hospital.. like it or not. i had to go... ahahahaha....
so... gedebuk, gedebak... i was admitted to the hospital at about 11.. my cervix was only 2 cm open. contractions was every 20-25 mins. the dr said to my mom and me.. she will deliver maybe in subuh. so didn't want me to go back coz hosp and house is 45 mins apart.. if things are not going well i may be giving birth somewhere else... not in hosp.
ok.. i was sent to my room at about 12. aimi was staying with me. ayang went back coz nayya had to have either one of her parents with her. so ma said we'll come tomorrow at 5 ok...
they made v.e., i think that was the cause of the labour to really started getting closer, i mean, the contractions. first i was being just cool about it. aimi was asking are u ok kakak??? i said am ok. its just contractions. then at 1 i had to go the toilet.. after that the contractions got worse. then at 2 or 2.30 again to the loo... worse.. they are getting closer... a about 3 i think, aimi woke up n called ayang.. saying i was in pain... a lot of pain, ayang said ask the nurse. then she called ba... after that she called the nurse. dr came to see me, said opened 6 cm... time to admit to birthing ward. so was wheeled to birthing ward at about 3.30 am. aimi stayed outside. i was in pain rite.. first i said to aimi .. hold my hands... sakit sgt ni...then, when pain got worse she gave me her hands.. i said.. no don't hold me!! ahahahah... bad me.
in the room the nurses was trying to prepare me.. i was like aaa.... painfulll.... aaaa, what are u doing????!!!, then ...aaaaaaa, aaaaaaaa....... breath.... aaaaa.... then, can u make then headrest higher??????, then, aaaa.....aaaa....., hehehe.... what angry me i have turned into. then one of them asked do u want that loughing gas?? (forgot the medical name)... yes anything to relieve this pain...aaaaa....aaaaaa.....god its not working???? !!!!! .. saying i cant have the gas... actually i was in pain, so i couldn't inhale properly... then one of them said like this take a deep breath then the gas will come out. i just said yes.. just let this contraction be done first....
it was crazy... they didn't even had the time to put on the baby's heart monitoring machine on, then, at about 4.15 or earlier... was not looking at time .. how could i?? the dr came. said, maryam... i will break your water bag ok?? i was like yes.. anything.. in the irritated tone. actually i was already having the 'bearing down' phase... baby had reached the coming out canal.. ahahah.. my crazy terms. so, when the dr did that, she said her head's already engaged... dah turun la.... maryam i want you to push.... aaaaa....... now i kinda forget that part... did i push or i was being angry? i think i pushed... i just said... i think i'm gonna let go... it was really feeling of wanting to b.o., so i just pushed... then they said again... don't let go.. i think about 3-4 times pushing then futya came out... its a girl... my first words were 'alhamdulillah'... its over. then only the specialist came... too late. i already gave birth. 4.30 am
know what?? they gave me something i thing oxytocin for the uterus to shrink.. that was painful drug.. heheheh... like having contractions again... then i had to stay in the. ward for the next 2 and a half hours, it was cold, uncomfortable and painful. i was tired yet i couldn;t do anything.. they gave me futya hold give milk and hold. i fell asleep with her... but not a deep one, coz fear of dropping her. then one of the nurses took futya away... just to let me rest.
then aimi came in at about 6.40 am.. she didn'nt know till that time. so did ayang.. he got to know at somewhat 7 am... just imagine... nayya, everyone was in the room, futya... noone... wuwuwu... nobody watched ... but all is well... my labour was short one.
futya had bruises on her cheeks... coz she was chubby, so in the birth canal her face was a bit squashed??... her eyes too had blood clots.but all went away after 2 months. but she has a lot of birthmarks, ate her back, on her hands, legs..
she has curly hair. thinner lips, think she's quite like nayya... just a bit different in her eyes, hair n lips..
after having her in our little family for almost 4 months... nayya really loves her sister.she would be quite protective with futya, not everyone can hold her sister. if that person she doesn't like the person no can do.. she would cry for me and bring that person to me to give futya back to me.. she's not jealous of futya.. knows when to ask for attention, she too breastfeed so, always waits for her turn. only time she would just be a little impatient is when she's sleepy.. but i kinda know ways to deal with both.
ah well. think that's enaf update??? ehehehe... sorry i have been so lazy in updating and making excuses is not good rite?? the thought of updating is alwas there. but my mood simply was not cooperating.
selamat hari raya aidil fitri... maaf zahir batin.... minal aidil wal faizin...
nayya futya in one stroller, jusco 
